I got an SASE back today in the mail. It was from the Indiana Review; postdated September 30, 2005. So I figure...This is Guinness World Record material for a rejection from a print journal. I mean I sent the sucker out on September 26, 2005 and I receive the SASE on October 4th of the same year nonetheless. What did they use the pony express? Then I thought: Gee.... I didn't think my sub was that bad. So I open the sucker up and I read the rejection slip.
Now let me get this straight. I sent my sub on September 26, figuring that it'll take about 4 to 10 days to get there just in time for October 1st . Instead by some freak occurrence they get it within a couple of days maybe and they're whipping it back at me by September 30th. But I mean October 1st is like the next day. Do you get the impression (like me) that they never even took a look at the sucker and that right about now my poetry, printed on Xerox Ultra White 20 lb standard weight paper, is being abused and tortured into admitting that it's vapid and meaningless drivel by some intern? Something tells me I shouldn't waste my time and money sending them another sub. But then I figure what the hell...even interns have to have some fun.